Recently I have been so challenged about really living a life that works 100% for me! I am not expressing all that comes to me in moments and especially times when I need to be the most open. How come I do not feel safe with some people to trust what they do with my vulnerability? Its probably because unfortunately I keep being proven right as being so honest and vulnerable has then been used to gain an outcome that is not mutually beneficial.
I believe one of the challenges is I want to assume the best of everyone and often believe they have the same values and beliefs as I do. Then I find out that in fact I am the fool for allowing myself to believe this is possible just because someone says I love you. Understanding their intent is important but more importantly having the sensory acuity to know when you are being exploited in the nicest possible way. And each time you pull back they draw you back in as they know just what to say and how to make you feel special. The challenging thing about this is the person isn't fully aware of their actions and behaviours and can not see what they are doing. Deniability it seems is the best excuse to get out of something you can't handle or don't want to instead of talking about it, having an open honest conversation.
It's interesting how a person can say something and then behave in a totally contradictory way and then use what they said as the "get out clause" or the "I haven't done anything wrong as I said right in the beginning" line. Knowing that some one is vulnerable in a specific area of the relationship and not being careful not to encourage it, so as to not have the desired outcome which will be inevitable, for me is the act of a master deceiver.
So now what.......Well you learn the lessons you need to, you forgive yourself and you move forward so that the perfect partnership of someone who loves you with the right intention and honours who you are, respects you too much to take advantage of you weaknesses, is genuine is all they say and do and just loves you for who you are! But until that wonderful person arrives in your life to lick your wounds, you share your story and embrace the healing process. You work very hard on not assuming everyone is like them no matter how many times it has happened, it is just you haven't learn't the lesson yet............well now I HAVE! Thank you Divine Source for you love as it is the only true one x
Beautiful:) Vulnerability...we all have it but the questions is have you set your boundaries? Have you got to a point in life where you have a secure sense of self, the unconditional love of self acceptance and the courage to be real? The stronger that is the stronger your inner space is and you will know that whatever it is is not about you but about them! You stop caring and you will be able to trust people but be able to say 'no' and walk away with a smile.
ReplyDeleteI see you with a cat, look at them, learn from them. They give love at their terms and they dont need us to be what they are. They strong, independent and proud. Self esteem, sense of self, trust, believe is all that is needed and when you there real love will come and the world will see you! You will trust people and people might still disappoint you and things will not always go well but you will be ok and you will only carry on.
In case you wondering :) yes I am talking from experience. I always trusted people until they would prove me wrong and be hurt! Now I still trust people but dont care if they like me or not, then I cared to much because I was looking for love out there,acceptance. But is not anywhere except inside us and until we find it we do live in a illusion. :) Love and light to you!
PS: reading some of your post and realising we have lots in common including the letting go of some weight this year! ;) x
Thank you for your comments and insights! I really appreciate it and its all so true! Working through these elements and focusing on myself as the main entity rather than those outside of myself. I realise I attract these experiences so as to learn from them so I am learning each time how to love myself as the starting point, rather than looking for it else where. I love this journey as it allows me to really find my own true love of self! Working on the weight release so again looking after me and my health and vitality so I can live authentically and honestly with myself. Much love and light to you xxxx
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