Joining the personal development world

Now this was going to be a journey I had no idea that would totally change my life. I went to this free seminar as I had been invited by 3 different people on different occasions who all said you MUST go to this event! So I did. I attended my first Breakthrough to Success with Christopher Howard. And what an event it was. 4000 people in ExCel! I was not really that keen on the whole "Americanised" energy and clapping hands thing so just sat back and watched. I had booked the VIP package as was keen to fully experience the event in style. This proved to be a very fortuitous move. On day two of the event Chris wanted some one to come up on stage and be a test case for his emotional obliterator exercise - so he checked in with a few people in the audience to her their storey. I oddly enough I put my hand up and he chose me to share my storey. It was about my anger and how to manage it especially in relationships. After chatting to a few other people he invited me up on stage to share in the exercise. Little did I know what was about to happen to me......I ended up doing all the Chris Howard courses, working for them on a part time basis to help with their event management and then I got more involved with the office and what was going on. Eventually after about a year of already working for them on contract, they offered for me to take over the business full time. Now normally I would have said no due to the fact I didn't like being "employed" again as my little business was doing really well. However it was the product and being able to help people in such a great way that really influenced my decision to make the move. What a journey that decision turned out to be.......

Having your bubble burst

What an incredible time it has been. So many ups and downs but most of all so many changes which have been awesome! I had no idea that I was so blind to what is happening in the world as my model was so limited to my immediate environment, that only when that bubble was burst, did I recognise where things were.

Having worked in the hospitality industry for so many years and more recently working in events and promoting international speakers, I had a certain view or perception of what life was really about. You come out of the whole corporate world and discover the entrepreneurial world instead, which I have to say works very differently. I love it as it allowed one to express themselves, work their own hours, work harder than I ever did before and learn so many new things. Now I understood why people were so keen to have their own business, however in reality it isn't a business, it's just you contracting your time out to a couple of different employers instead of one! Not only that but you suddenly find yourself exchanging time for money again! You suddenly have to rely on yourself for your motivation, coming up with ideas, doing things on your own and being on your own a lot! So I started to wander why so many people thought that working for yourself would give you a sense of freedom? Freedom from what exactly? Its very exciting in the first few months when you are discovering what you want to do, how you going to do it and what it is going to look like. So we focus on getting a great name for the business, a logo, a website and our business cards. Then we have to get the social media stuff sorted and make sure people know we have finally arrived in our own business! Now if you are clever you have not burnt your bridges with your previous employers or clients and you actually have some work to start you off, unless of course you decided to change what you were doing completely? What was the reason you wanted to do "this" in the first place? Did I think it would be a good business model even though I had done it as a part time hobby thing and enjoyed it so much? It was great as it gave me a break from my mundane job however doing it full time now, it doesn't quiet have the same feel to it! It feels like a job -ahhhhhh.

This is what I went through when I set up my first business in the UK called KinX Management. Yes I know a very strange name isn't it? Well here was my thought pattern behind coming up with this "brilliant" unique business name............I wanted to help people to sort out their kinks in their businesses. When looking up the usability of the name Kinks I found a lot of unrelated and rather unsavoury links to the name Kinks. So I changed the spelling to KinX purely for the purpose getting a .com site and was easy to find me if you knew how to spell it from the beginning! One thing I will say is it was a talking point so a lot of people remember it.   So where am I going with this........well a job can be just the perfect thing for someone who likes working in a structured environment with people and activity around them. Finding the right job is usually more of the issue, so not everyone should have to think that if they have a job that they are not "just over broke". Even entrepreneurs have to employee people to help run their business! So make a clear choice based on what works for you! If you want to try a business then do one while you are employed and when you earn the same or more and love what you doing outside of your job, then make the change x

What a great day today! So many new understandings and learnings about myself and what is happening around me at the same time. Where was I.....oh yes the very first time I stood up for my values...that really was a turning point in so many ways.There were so many other examples particularly in my working world where I would be further challenged. On a personal level this is true too. Especially in relationships.

 Understanding each others personal and professional values is VERY important in the synchronicity of building a future together. I will talk more about this in detail at a later stage. Keen not to spend too much time in the past so going to give a very quick synopsis of the last 10 years so that it makes sense on how I got the place I am now.....

A little past to say where you have been...

I started my personal journey many years ago without realising it. Moving to the UK now some 10 years ago was a big step in anyone's life, however for me it just seemed to be the right thing to do at the time. I had recently got a divorce, amicable and we still remain friends, closed up a good little business and decided to brave the opportunities in a country I had visited once! Little did I know my journey was really beginning! Wow the years have past and I feel as if it has been a life time already. Being in the UK has changed my entire outlook and perception of the world. It has been an amazing opportunity to experience so many incredible things that if I had remained in South Africa, I just know I wouldn't have grown as much as I have done now. These past 10 years have also been the most challenging of my young life so far, however the most life changing in so many ways. With the weather differences, the lifestyle change, the exposure to a multitude of cultures and the fantastic opportunities to travel to new countries there have been many more ups than downs! Yes the weather isn't great, the lifestyle is totally different and not so sociable or out doors, but then the experience of the countries and cultures are just such an adventure. You certainly become more worldly in a country like the UK especially if you are willing to take risks, learn from others, try new things and really commit yourself to a new way of being. I learnt a lot about myself and what I wanted to achieve and at the time this was a great driver for me to achieve success in a whole new environment. It was a lot harder than I ever believed it could be, but at the same time I have grown so much as person that looking back I am grateful for the challenges that I have faced.

I have always looked at the world as a sort of playground -a place where anything was possible and probable without consciously knowing it. The drive that pushed me to make the choices I have made seems to stem from an influence that is common to most South Africans (even though I was born in Zimbabwe), to get ahead and be everything you can be. Much of the time I believe some of my actions were based on little more than a "hunch" however this seemed to support my journey. Sure I made mistakes but nothing that I couldn't really work my way through and learn from. Finding the right place to call home was a big issue for me as even though I was keen to be able to go to South African type places, I was set on integrating as much as I could into the English culture and choosing to refrain from being around too many South African's all of the time. Not knowing London at all I had no idea but went with my instinct and found happiness in Putney! A great little place to live. Even when I first moved to Putney, I had a real sense of belonging and soon found out that in fact there were many South African's living in the area too. It kind of reminded me of Fourways where I used to live in Johannesburg - same kind of feel but different. However I didn't spend a huge amount of time on socialising as was working for the Hilton Hotel group and amercing myself into the job and English business culture. Constantly being pulled up for my "south africanisms" I quickly learnt under the management of my Italian boss, how I needed to fit in. Now fitting in for me is just a totally foreign concept as anyone who knows me will testify too! So after a year and half of towing the line, the company decided not to expand on a project I had been in charge of, into the rest of the UK, even though I had proven it to be a highly lucrative possibility. It was all about company politics and unfulfilled promises so this was the first opportunity that presented itself to me on my self discovery journey. Was I going to stay for the sake of the job even though the company had not followed through on so many promises they had made to me in the first few months I was there? When I decided to resign it was because I felt that having spent so many hours each day creating this new lucrative market for them, they had chosen to ignore my dedication and hold me back due to internal politics. It was a matter or choice. Once I handed my letter in, then suddenly they were responsive to my needs and ambitions. So I was presented with a situation where I got a personal phone call from my Regional bosses boss, to ask me to stay and they would increase my salary and within the next two years I could expand the project nationally. So there it was - what I wanted but not quiet. Why did I have to resign for them to offer what they had originally promised? I made a decision that day that would affect every decision from there on..., I thanked them for the kind offer and turned it down. It was as I was soon to find out, the first time I had consciously decided that I would value my integrity over the easy choice. That is the day my life changed forever.....

At the beginning...

Well this is my first day of a very exciting journey which I actually started a few months ago! However I am now ready to write about it as feel that I can share with the world my experiences in the hope that in some small way I may be able to help others and I have been helped. This blog is about a personal journey from being very masculine focused in my work and career and the journey I am now on to change my life completely and be in my feminine power more to influence and promote a much better way of life. Part of this is about me personally and a lot of it will be about the things that happen around me and the influence that may have on where I go and who I become. This is the first day of the rest of my life! I love it x